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I'm baaack!

To the 8500 and counting viewers of this blog, thank you. Thank you for putting up with the triviality of this blog. If I gave anyone of you a hard and even impossible time while reading one or two or some of my posts, I am sorry. I know there's no point in being apologetic, but I would like to be courteous.

I was on the verge of taking this site down tonight. I thought this blog was a waste of cyber space. I find most of my posts insignificant and insubstantial. And worst, I feel that this whole thing is an embarrassment of my petty little brain. The self is really one's harshest critic. I have cut myself some slack already. That's what the two months I abandoned this site were for. 

Then I started thinking very hard about the things I really love and enjoy doing. To name a few, there's reading and collecting books; watching movies, TV series, and random videos; regularly browsing through my bookmarked blogs, news sites, and other sites; social networking maybe; and exploring the world of music, history, literature, culture and the arts via the internet. But such endeavors would not be complete without sharing and telling the world about it. There's just something fulfilling about that. It completes the whole experience.

This is the beauty of life: an opportunity always presents itself. Change can always happen. And we can always hope for the best. 

So, 

Cheers! Let me know what you think about this epiphany by leaving a comment. Or you may ignore this post. I'm totally cool with that too. 

Puerto Galera: A Beautiful Escape

At last, we made it happen. The three of us have been wanting for long to get away from the routine, the mundane, the common. Thus we searched the map of Luzon for a possible destination in which the total expense is relatively cheap as we only had meager budget allotted for this trip. 

As the master planner of the group, I was in charge of the itinerary, bookings, and other plans. Successfully, we all made it work. Need proof/s? Browse or read on. ;)

After having breakfast at Jollibee in Turbina,
we took a Jam Liner bus to Batangas Pier.
We left the terminal around 7:30AM. 

The trip from Turbina in Laguna via the Calabarzon road to Batangas
took us only an hour and a half and I must say that, as first timers,
we really loved the green and lavish scenery of nature from our windows.
We hardly slept and just stared at such beautiful view.
So we arrived at Batangas Pier at 9:00AM.
Here's our photo before we boarded the ferryboat. 

Our fellow tourists and vacationists.
They looked more excited in person though. ;)

Not a hint of seasickness at all.
Our happy and energetic souls after surviving an hour and a half trip on the sea.
The boat did rock us, but we rocked it more!

Our first photo and first steps on Puerto Galera soil.

This is our cottage.
We only paid PhP 1000 for one night. Good deal!

Visit their site: http://mountainbeachresort.com/
Puerto Galera is divided into three main areas: White Beach, Tamarraw, and Talipanan.
White Beach is the most commercial with its long chain of bars, restaurants,
souvenir shops, tattoo shops, hotels, etc. It is also the hub for Puerto Galera's 'night life'.
Not sure what's in Tamarraw area but there also cottages and inns there.
We stayed in Talipanan, the most serene and private of all.
That's what we aimed for anyway. 

Before we set out to our activities planned for the day!

The 'Day Life': a bombardment of photos

The photos we took were overwhelming, thus I'm posting just 10 of them and hopefully they would give you a glimpse or an impression of how truly serene the beach was and how relaxing and liberating it was to have a vacation in this beautiful spot in the Philippine archipelago. 

The 'Night Life'

@ White Beach

Fire dancing at the White Beach.

Next: Bar Hopping.

Not your typical Girls' Night Out! :D

To make a long story short,
we drank 2 pitchers of that and we all PASSED OUT. ;)

A photo op with the gay-tentainers.
They made an entertaining performance
we tipped in a little amount for their talent and guts. 

Mindoro Sling - a foe for the sober and a friend for the drunk.

Although this was a 2-day vacation, more or less we only spent 24 hours on the island, 4 hours on the sea for travel, and the rest for more commute. 

OUR FINALE.
Final stop @ Leynlie's Bar II for a refreshing cup of Mango shake,
drinking it under the coconut tree and overlooking a panoramic view of the sea.
It was pretty nostalgic already, for we knew we would be missing the island.
Plus we hated the commute on sea so we didn't want to board the boat just yet.

Farewell.. almost.

Tan?

And we're back to where we came from - the Pier.
Vacation's over.
So is this blog entry. 

I keep blog entries like this because someday, I think it would be better not just to browse through photos but to read through their captions as well. Pictures speak a thousand words, sure, but written words are more accurate and since time might smear or smudge our memories, it would be nice to keep a more vivid record of how great it was spent. :)

Rock Bottom

The ceiling was almost as black as the night sky. It didn't matter where she stared at ─ it was empty. She laid still, her eyes open but shaking. Her cheeks felt some cold drops of tears, quickly drying up. For the first time, she felt horribly and completely isolated, lost like a tiny island in the great Pacific ocean. Its serenity was unsettling for her. The vastness of the Earth and sky swallowed her into an irrepressible woe. She would rather sink in to the bottom of the ocean floor and lie there ─ restless, helpless, lifeless.

Last night, she hit rock bottom.

Sunday Breather

With only eleven days left before the end of classes this semester, just imagine the exhausting and depressing line-up of deadlines and other activities that glares from our worn out calendars. Everyday is procrastination day and we are live zombies. There's no worry though; after this hell week, I'm sure lots of us are going to get pampered, real well. In my case, I and my college best friends have plans already and right now, it is the only thing that is keeping us sane from all the load of school work that we are drowning in.

Anyway, I don't have much time to write and probably this is the crappiest blog entry I have ever written so let me just get this over with (nevertheless I love you, dear blog). 

So some of my relatives from the Bicol province came over today because my cousin was going to take the USTET (University of Sto. Tomas Entrance Test). Today was her big day and although we were very supportive, we pretty much left her in the campus with a cousin from her mom's side who goes to UST.

So I ditched all my school work today and his is how or where I got unzombiefied (hey that word does exist in zombie land):

TASTY DUMPLINGS
Masangkay St., Binondo, Manila

Dumplings

Silver Roll Bread

Hongma

Porkchop with Rice
This really a must try! It's one of a kind in Manila.
The meat are sliced so thinly yet the strong flavor is still there.
This meal will never fail your hungry stomach. 

S&R Membership Shopping
ASEANA-BACLARAN Branch

S&R is your Costco equivalent in the Philippines
S&R: http://www.snrshopping.com/
Costco: http://www.costco.com/

After hours of grocery shopping, this is the hungry customers' next stop.

Because right now this is the closest I could get to New York! 

This is simply HEAVEN IN MY MOUTH.  

The Back Up

Let me tell you the story of Will Freeman in the film 'About A Boy' where he is literally a "free man" for being happily unemployed, wealthy, a bachelor in his 30s, and for claiming the absence of family and friends in his life. However absurd these given conditions are, Will's character does exist in his own island, as he calls himself so. In fact he thinks he is Ibiza and considers himself an island dweller who just needs to visit the mainland from time to time. Then Marcus comes along, the 12-year-old boy-hero who first saved himself from being socially-awkward then saves Will too from his shallow (right, that sounds like hollow) and superficial life. In the end, Jon Bon Jovi was right, "No man is an island." and all the characters found their back-up.

Sometimes, I think I am an island too since I often find myself isolated from social circles or groups. But unlike Will, mine is not by choice. If I would be an island, I would like to be surrounded by 7, 106 others, just like the setting of the Philippine archipelago. But something has been keeping me away from the other islands. Maybe just like Will, my back up is on it's way too to serve as glue to my own Pangaea.

FRIENDS (8 Years Later)

Dear Chandler, Monica, Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe:

“This is harder than I thought it would be.” – Monica Geller-Bing (The Last One) 

Today, eight years after your show’s finale, I find myself in the same position as Monica, the rest of your gang, and your millions of fans who have journeyed along with your stories of friendship, family, and love and how fun and amazing you portrayed them to be. You gave me the best hope in my relationships and most especially, you shared the warmth and joy of your friendship with us, your audience who you also treated as your most loyal friends – that’s because we were. From the pilot episode up to the very last one, you have had our faith in your plot or story, our sympathy with your characters, and our love for your friendships that’s one in a million. You left us with some of the best memories we will ever have in our lives.

How could you know that last night, somewhere across the world, a 20-year-old college student who just heard of your show 2 months ago would be crying for hours in front of her computer and then to her best friend after completing all 10 seasons of FRIENDS? What is 10 years in 2 months! Am I a big loser for having watched your show just now after it’s finale in 2004? Well whatever, I’m glad I didn’t miss it at all. 

It's so hard to say goodbye.

Thank you Chandler, Monica, Ross, Rachel, Joey, and Phoebe for being my friends when I’m alone in the dorm, for making me laugh so hard and bad every time I’m not feeling well (you were my medicine, my cure for bad stuffs), for tugging my heartstrings when Chandler proposed to Monica and for tearing them too when Rachel and Joey’s romance was put off, for reminding me how lovely it is to be a girl during Phoebe’s wedding, and to top all these, FOR BEING MY FRIENDS and helping me get through my isolation period in the past two months. FRIENDS will always be my favorite TV series. Farewell. You gave me the best time of my life.

GOODBYE NOW. 

Rants of a Working Student

At the end of an exhausting week at school or at work, it is only fair to look forward to a free weekend and unburden ourselves of the loads of work that wear us out and recharge for yet another demanding set of responsibilities for the following week. Saturdays could be spent to involve ourselves in extracurricular activities - physically, socially, or mentally - or to finish all unfinished business from the previous week and prepare for the next one. Sundays are for our spiritual and emotional essentials with REST as the primary activity on this day and 'Family' as the most important feature. Sometimes, however, this pattern is disrupted since nowadays, people are engrossed in more tasks and more activities that there seems to be little time for everything. Yet somehow, we manage to set a balance between life and school or work because we know that the physical body has limitations which even our human powers cannot transcend. We gotta rest.

Today is Monday. I missed my weekend. Every bit of me is exhausted. Worn out. Drained. In fact, I am too tired that I can't even rant enough. 

During the weekdays, I go to the university and face taxing requirements from my professors. I am a senior for crying out loud. All the quizzes, papers, exams, and projects keep coming in as if there's never enough of them. And the fact that we're from UP means that more is demanded from us. It is a shame to the university and to our highly-esteemed professors if we submit mediocre papers or perform poorly in examinations. It kills me whenever I feel that I am not good enough, for I know that UP deserves better students. 

I always think that I am not good enough. Sometimes I blame it to myself, sometimes to my parents. My father did not finish his college degree. He was a farmer turned businessman turned driver. He was once lucky once with our business (that is why I was able to attend high school in Ateneo de Naga) but his adulterous acts and addiction to vices corrupted our fate and family. I despise him up to this day. My mother earned a degree in college but they married at a young age so she became a housewife by profession. She has a small business back home - a bakery - and now she is applying for work overseas. 

So here's the fact: I am the eldest among five (5) children of two unemployed parents. More facts: I was raised as a strong, independent person. The idea of being grounded, spoiled, and overprotected are foreign to me. I spent my childhood looking after our store, taking care of my siblings, and studying to keep my name on top of the honor roll. I couldn't count the number of times when I heard the phrase "I Love You" from my parents. That's because they never uttered those words. One or two years ago, I was overly depressed and miserable and sent an SMS to my mother saying, "Don't you care for me at all, ma? You never ask where am I or how am I doing. What if one day, I just kill myself?" She replied, "May tiwala man baga kaya ako saimo." (It's because I have trust in you.)

I grew up believing that I was the one who raised myself. I had to learn and do everything on my own. I built my own dreams and set my own goals. I bought my own clothes. I did all my homework on my own. I went to school activities without their permission. I brought my aunt's maid in PTA meetings. I ate and slept alone. I chose my own degree and my own university. I picked my own apartment/dormitory. I made friends whom they never met. I have gone to places without their knowledge. I have read many books and watched many movies which they never hear the stories of. Last but not the least, I am writing this blog post and they do not even know that their daughter has a blog that exists. (And maybe tell me that I shouldn't be posting things like this on the Internet.)

Perhaps this is where my ocean of insecurity is coming from. No one was there to calm me when I woke up from a nightmare at the middle of the night, to defend me from those bullies in school,  to tutor me in my Math and Science homework, to watch me during special school activities, to celebrate my medals and certificates with me, to cheer me up after a bad day, to help me make decisions on my college degree, to watch cartoons with me, to read me storybooks before bedtime, to make me a glass of milk, to comb my hair, to take care of me when I am sick, to cuddle with me in bed, and to experience life.

School was my only teacher and it only made me feel so small. Every day, as my world grows bigger and wider, I doubt if I will ever be intelligent enough and if my life will ever be as extraordinary as with the lives I see all over the internet. And so there goes my yearning...

My weekly allowance is shared and provided by my aunt and my uncle and usually, the amount that they give me is not enough. I couldn't ask for more, because it would be too much to ask for already. This is why I decided to get a part-time job as an online English tutor. I work from 8:00-11:00AM and 7:00-12:00MN during Saturdays and Sundays. In between those hours, I either do my school requirements or sleep. By the way, I could also work from Monday to Friday evenings, 7:00-12:00MN; I do sometimes, but ...

I AM EXHAUSTED. 

With this job on my hands, it feels like I have stopped living and it's killing me! All I wanna do is read books and online articles, watch movies and TV series, see places, create memories, blog, and many others. I just wanna live. I just wanna learn, and learn, and learn even more so that I may be good and deserving enough to get a good job soon because I want to send my siblings to good schools and provide for them a good life because they have been through enough crap already. Is that so wrong? I hate being poor. It is so unfair. Now I am drained like an empty glass.. and I am breaking. Sorry for the indecent blog entry.

My 'Maugmang Lugar'

One does not simply run away from home, forget home, or find a new home; one's home stays, is never forgotten, and is never lost. Admittedly, there were moments when I doubted my own home, my family, but this previous weekend, I proved myself wrong and started licking my own wounds. Behind that is a long story which I shall skip.

After five months of missing and yearning for home, I finally got to see and visit my family. They live in a small barrio in the Bicol province that is eight to ten hours travel time away from the province of Laguna, my current place of residency while I am in the university. It is difficult and challenging to live independently but it is harder to be away from one's family. When I was in high school, I went to the city for my studies, and now, in an even farther place. Years of long distance studies is a huge sacrifice. After all, all my family's future stake is on me. Ah, pressure.

Life in the province (countryside) is absolutely different than it is in the city. It is not better, but it is different in plain, simple, ordinary but soothing and peaceful ways. Lucky are we who, at certain points in our lives, have roots and families and provinces to go back to when we feel the need and want to. Part of understanding our essence is acknowledging our roots. A tree whose roots are dead is dead too.

Here's what the weekend made me realize: It doesn't take a perfect family to create perfect memories; they happen all the time and just have to be recognized by grateful and content hearts. We don't have much in our family, but the love that we have for one another suffices for the other things that we don't. It is enough.

Here's the beauty of a weekend spent in the province (and why it is more fun there):

• Took a long bus ride and enjoyed the beautiful, panoramic view of Camarines Sur in the breaking dawn
• Was fetched up from the bus terminal by my siblings from whom I saw the biggest and warmest smiles and got the tightest embraces
• Ate under the old but lush Mango tree in our backyard while enjoying windy afternoons under clear blue skies and the never-leaving sun
• Rested under the shade of our precious Mango tree, listened to my aunts and uncles' stories, and laughed until I got teary-eyed
• Ate our own harvest from our own garden and backyard (buko juice and meat, ginataang gabi, bananas, papayas, other fruits and vegetables)
• Ate at Bigg's Diner (every Bicolano's favorite restaurant) and ate my favorite Fried Chicken recipe
• Went from one relative's house to another (their doors and dining tables were always open) 
• Cooked my specialty, my siblings' favourite ─ Macaroni Soup
• Went to the beach (free entrance) with my family
• Went picnicking at the Patio with relatives
• Drove the motorcycle (I do have a Driver's License after all)
• Shouted and played with kids in the neighborhood as carefree as ever and like nothing else mattered
• Woke up everyday at 6AM and sleep at 9PM (time is slow in the province)
• Finally saw the people who I've been dying to see in months
• Freed my mind and got the peace of mind I've always aspired for

Home is my happy place.
Bicol is my maugmang lugar.

The day I rode with a bunch of high school students who dragged me to hell

They made screeching, squealing, earsplitting noise with their cruel, big laughs. The words they uttered sounded like evil chants to me. My ears bled inside. They pricked my skin with teeny-tiny tridents that stung. Their invisible, furry tails wagged before they strangled me one by one and then altogether. I gasped for air, but there was only car fumes to breathe. Their presence gave off heat as hot as the initial heat of an iron that my brain cells burned and I perspired like cold bottle of water. My face slowly turned red, covering its overall paleness. My lips were dry and choppy, barely moving. My tiny eyes started to get wet as I started screaming in my head words I did not even understand. It was the devil's hour in the afternoon.

Besides religious teachings and literary readings on the concept of hell, no one among us has really ever been to hell, nor heaven, to speak widely and intelligently about such metaphysical topic. It is the same case with death; yet it is ironic how people assume vast knowledge that of a dead person, or in my case, that of a person in hell. Nevertheless, today, I encountered hell.

TO THOSE UP RURAL STUDENTS I RODE WITH IN THE JEEPNEY TO CALAMBA THIS AFTERNOON, I BEG ALL THE GODS TO MAKE YOU GROW UP IMMEDIATELY AND STOP BEING A THREAT TO HUMANITY. Albeit our attempts to ssshhh your big mouths, you remained insensitive. Your noise was unreasonable and unbearable. With all the traffic and your noise, I literally wanted to jump out of the jeepney. That was the worst trip I ever had in my entire life.

The day I started reading again and decided to quit social networking

For starters, I picked George Orwell's 1984 from my collection of books to kick off my love for reading again. I was cleaning my room last night when I saw my book collection all dusty, webby, and unnoticed/rejected (I am not sure how exactly I have treated my precious babies) and I got so upset upon realizing how much time I have been wasting on the Internet. It has worked fairly for me but recently, I have been spending unreasonable amount of time in social networking sites (SNS) to the extent of putting my life in unhealthy conditions due to the sedentary lifestyle I am living. Not having sufficient sleep, skipping meals, straining my eyes, exposing myself to radiation, and not doing physical exercises and activities might cost be health issues sooner or later. When I visited my practicum supervisor two or three weeks ago, he noticed how pale I have gotten and even teased me anemic. That was my call to stop already! I bet my cells and tissues are already going suicidal on me because I have put them through great stress. So before this total Internet addiction eats me up alive, I have got to take precaution and moderation right away. It will be lame and too difficult if I deactivate my Facebook and Twitter accounts so I will not but still check them occasionally since a part of my academic and social life is in there, it is also my constant form of communication with my siblings in the province, it is a vital tool when I have to reseach people (called stalking) and you know, sometimes I just have to live vicariously to the lives of other people. But I do have to check my email regularly and blog regularly as well because it makes me happy, so I guess that with the sound of things, it seems that I will still be spending quite an amount of time in SNS and in the Internet but I swear for my sake that I will stop hovering around my own posts in my profile as well as in my news feed and not soak and drown in them anymore since it also often ends up in regret and bitterness anyway whenever I compare my life with the life of those well-off bitches and bastards who got better parents so they have better lives. Oh forget it.

Now in order to make things work, I need a diversion. Here goes the rekindling of my professed love for reading. By the way, most of my books are classics and literary winners. You see, whenever I am about to purchase a book, more than anythine else, I am concerned if it is a classic or is canonized. That way, I am confident that I am getting my money's worth.

I used to be a bookworm, but then I ceased from being a bookworm to being a moviebuff (include TV series). Both hobbies have benefits but it's still different when you actually read a book. A good one huh. We are what we read. So I think and tell myself, if I read intelligent books, that's what I'll become too in due due time and in due number of books read of course. Books contain all the knowledge which we need to acquire and if we know so much, we can only do so much. I was born poor but I will not die one. I'll do that by being smart.

Cheers to this day!

Long weekends in the Philippines

 Rappler.com reports:

MANILA, Philippines (UPDATED) - A long weekend is in store for Filipinos next week, after President Benigno Aquino III has signed Proclamation No 455 declaring August 20, next Monday, a regular holiday throughout the country.

This is in observance of the Eid'l Fitr, when Muslims end their fast, the Palace said.

The Eid'l Fitr holiday is immediately followed by Ninoy Aquino Day on Tuesday, August 21. 

Eid'l Fitr is one of the regular holidays for 2012, as per Proclamation No. 295, series of 2011, while the Ninoy Aquino Day is a Special (Non-Working) Holiday.

The proclamation of the Eid'l Fitr holiday is in accordance with the Islamic calendar (Hijra) or the lunar calendar, or upon Islamic astronomical calculations. - Rappler.com

Well hello, long weekend! It's a four-day vacation for everyone in the Philippines and I can just imagine how many millions of students and workers are celebrating this moment, including me. However, I could not help but at least be concerned about the fact that due to the very recent August monsoon that has left several towns and cities in our country devastated from the heavy flooding, much damage has already been incurred upon learning due to the suspension of classes day after day and with the two consecutive holidays on Monday and Tuesday coming up, classes will be called off again. I just think that, most probably, interruption to learning will bear negative effects upon learning itself. But I'm sure we will not just get away with all the days classes were suspended. College students might not have their semestral breaks anymore and the school year for high school and grade school students might be extended up to April or even May. This only concerns the students and education. How about the workers and the economy? I'm sure that is a different story.

Don't get me wrong, 'course I love holidays, I do, but then again I'm just concerned. And one more thing I am deeply concerned of: I hope that I get the money for my bus ticket before Friday. I wish a miracle would happen. 

The things 'How I Met Your Mother' taught me

Stella: You know I once talked my way out of speeding ticket?
Ted: Really?
Stella: I was heading upstate with my parents, I was doing 90 on the country roads. I got pulled over. So this cop, gets out of his car, swaggers over and he says, 'Lady, I've been waiting for you all day.' And I said, 'Sorry Officer, I got here as fast as I could.'
Ted: For real?
Stella: No, it's just a joke. I know that you're tired of waiting. And you may have to wait a little while more but, she's on her way, Ted. And she's getting here as fast as she can.

─

I have been working on my manuscript's first draft the whole day, plus I really couldn't resist watching FRIENDS (the TV show) so I kind of get caught in it in the middle part of the day but I'm working on my 7th page now and almost done with my quota for the day when this scene from HIMYM randomly popped up in my mind and screw the way things were going for me. Most girls' problem is that we overthink things a lot and being completely aware of that, I have been trying to stay focused on my manuscript but it's like an itch there in my head that I can't resist from not scratching. What I'm trying to say is, now I'm all soaked in bitterness and depression and so upset that I could not just be like those with really hard-like-rock hearts that they don't think about men so much and are just fine with being single and whatever it is they care about so much more than being in a relationship. You know those times when you just feel like you wanna rip your heart off your chest because its like a graveyard of fairy tales, childish dreams, and dying stars and hopeless wishes in there? Yeah, that's what I wanna do now.

Now if you happen to read this blog post, yeah I still wanna rip my heart off.

8/3/2008

In that envelope was my test permit. 

Four years ago, I took the University of the Philippines College Admission Test (UPCAT).

After
It was the last day of our senior retreat when the results came out. And just like that, I lost all the calmness in my body and soul. I was shook and freaked out! It was the next most important day to graduation day. It was today-your-future-unfolds day. So it's either I make it or break it; I go or I stay; I succeed or I fail.

As soon as I got home, I ran with all my breath straight to the computer. And then fudge, internet's down. My next move was to text my closest friends to kindly see if my name was on that goddamn list (I was mad already). Finally a friend replied.

That photo was the result of her reply. When she told me my name was not on the list, well I guess what happened to me is pretty obvious in the picture. Passing the UPCAT meant the whole world to me. Good thing that before I passed out crying, I received another text from a friend saying I did pass. UP Los Baños, Communication Arts. 

During

Did you notice the bracelet that I was wearing in the picture? I think it was a rosary-bracelet, something very holy and religious. I also wore a red-colored shirt because back then I considered red a lucky color plus it was a collared shirt - fit for the occasion and I was really comfortable in it. Every detail seemed very significant and delicate at that time - from the Mongol No.2 pencil I used, the what-brand-was-it eraser, that two-holed (doesn't sound right) sharpener, my healthy snacks, the prayer books, the Holy Rosary, St. Peter's robe I slept on the previous night, the mind-booster breakfast, and the list goes on, including all the churches I went to and prayed at. Heaven knows how desperate I was to pass the UPCAT. 

Big day came, I did what I had to do. Pass the exam. ☺

Before

The thing is, from the moment I heard about UP being the No. 1 university in the Philippines, I built my dreams around it. I had no plan B. Why, is there a UP version 2.0? It had to be UP or my future is good as over. Call me mad and crazy, but maybe I was. I dreamed the biggest, wildest, and most insane dreams, and I still do. But if there's one thing dreaming has taught me, it is this: Dream with your eyes open, not closed. 

─

Tomorrow, it's my sister's and cousin's turn to take the UPCAT. I don't want them to go through the same pressure I went through (even though I know they already are) so all I'm gonna tell them is this,

"Just do your best. May luck and God's grace be with you."